potty training sucks.

Potty training twins. It’s not for the faint of heart. There were will be tears and occasionally the kids will cry too. Whatever preconceived notion you have of how it will go? Throw it out the door right now. I’m serious. Like open your front door and throw imaginary ideas out of it and slam it shut. They have no place in the potty training business. Your child (or children as the case may be) is going to go thru the process as best they know how. They aren’t reading any step-by-step manuals. They are simply doing what feels right and comfortable to them.

That said…this process is going to suck. A lot. When I finally got pregnant most of my friends already had an infant or toddler so when we finally reached the potty training, there was so much advice. These moms sounded so matter of fact about it all. Like, you do this, then this and then that and all will be well.

Well, all WASN’T and ISN’T well. I’m not writing this to give anyone advice. I seriously don’t have any. Just want to let you know that if you are miserable and hating life and gagging everytime you have to clean up another poopy underwear, well…you are not alone.

I don’t know how fair it is to my children to be specific so I’m not going to specify what child is doing what. Child A is potty trained. It wasn’t an easy start or middle. But at least it had an end. They are doing great. No accidents. Well, there was one but it was a fluke and I think they were testing me because their sibling was already having so many. They are acting their age. They are potty trained. Halle-freakin-lujah.

Child B is defying all logic. All normal assumptions about the potty training process. I want to pull my hair out each and every day. Seriously the only thing that’s keeping me from totally losing it is the thought that all kids are potty trained before high school. Because seriously, it may take us that long. It already feels that long. If there is an issue to be addressed with potty training, we are dealing with it. And I hate it. I don’t hate my child, lets be clear about this. What I hate is that they are going thru something seemingly traumatic and I have no idea how to help them. I’m reading books, articles, reaching out to friends for advice and nothing, nada. We are making no progress. In fact, our lack of progress has actually caused us to regress. Which totally and completely sucks. Seriously though, there IS a limit to how many poopy pairs of underwear I can clean up in a day. That limit was reached…many times.

I’m writing this in hopes that I will have some progress, some happy news to report back SOON. Like this summer soon, not this year soon, but if we can have happy news to report in the year 2015 I’ll call that a win.

TTFN.